REVIEW: JURASSIC WORLD: DOMINION (2022)

JURASSIC WORLD: DOMINION (2022)

Supposed final installment of the Jurassic series takes place in a world where dinosaurs now live among us. While the world decides whether to co-exist or destroy the creatures, a self-serving genetic engineering company called Biosyn is using the beasts for their own gain. When they kidnap clone Maisie (Isabella Sermon) and raptor Blue’s baby Beta, Owen (Chris Pratt) and Claire (Bryce Dallas Howard) find themselves teaming up with series vets Dr. Alan Grant (Sam Neill), Dr. Ellie Sattler (Laura Dern) and Dr. Ian Malcolm (Jeff Goldblum) to infiltrate a dinosaur surrounded BioSyn headquarters to save Maisie, Beta and the world.

Dominion is directed by Colin Trevorrow from a script and story by he, Emily Carmichael and Derek Connolly. As such, it is basically a James Bond movie with dinosaurs. On paper that sounds like a great idea, but sadly Dominion is a tired sequel that shows this series is out of gas. There are top notch SPFX and some entertaining action sequences, but it’s mostly replayed bits from the previous films and makes the cinematic mistake of making dinosaurs dull. There are no risks taken or any innovation with the story or it’s creatures. Between the scenes of 007-ish skullduggery inside the Biosyn headquarters, we once again have a massive super predator, the underdeveloped Giganotosaurus, and once again a certain fan-favorite critter comes to the group’s rescue to take it on. It’s getting tiresome, as are the incredibly two-dimensional villains led by Biosyn’s CEO Dr. Lewis Dodgson (Campbell Scott). It’s a tedious and overlong 146 minutes and one is looking for it to finally be over, long before the actual end credits roll. Obviously, the film takes no risks in its climax either, by wrapping everything up in a neat and predictable bow. A tired and extremely mediocre final(?) chapter.

The cast are fine but are given very little to work with. Pratt and Howard still have some chemistry and are fine as the action heroes/leads. Isabella Sermon is good as an older Maisie and holds her own in the action with the adults. Jeff Goldblum is Jeff Goldblum reprising his role as Dr. Ian Malcolm and even his dialog lacks that sarcastic fun that Goldblum can deliver like no other actor. Dern and Neill are enjoyable as returning Dr. Grant and Dr Sattler but the chemistry between them was oddly absent. B.D. Wong returns as Dr. Wu, who is portrayed as more of a sympathetic character this time, which doesn’t really work. DeWanda Wise is solid as smuggler and pilot Kayla, though Campbell Scott’s villainous Dr. Dodgson is a dull and two-dimensional villain whose schemes including giant locusts don’t even make sense. A good cast with very weak material.

Jurassic World gave this series a jolt of renewed fun and Fallen Kingdom took the series in a bit of a new direction. Dominion sadly shows any revived energy or innovation with the format was short lived and this series is sinking into the tar pits like some of its prehistoric critters. There are a few entertaining action sequences, and it was fun to see classic series characters back in action one more time, but the material doesn’t support the cast or critters to give this series the fitting climactic chapter the franchise and its fans deserved.

-MonsterZero NJ

  Rated 2 and 1/2 (out of 4) T-Rexs

REVIEW: JURASSIC WORLD: FALLEN KINGDOM (2018)

JURASSIC WORLD: FALLEN KINGDOM (2018)

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The latest installment of the franchise takes place three years after the disastrous opening of Jurassic World. A volcano on Isla Nublar has become dangerously active and the U.S. government declines to save the animals still there. John Hammond’s former partner, Benjamin Lockwood (James Cromwell) asks Claire Dearing (Bryce Dallas Howard) to join a rescue mission to save the dinosaurs from the doomed island and to convince her ex-boyfriend Owen Grady (Chris Pratt) to join them. Once on the island Claire, Owen and their team are betrayed and they discover that this “rescue mission” has a far more sinister purpose.

Fallen Kingdom is directed by J.A. Bayona, the Spanish filmmaker behind the atmospheric and spooky haunted house flick The Orphanage and the bittersweet fantasy A Monster Calls. His script is by previous installment director Colin Trevorrow and Derek Connor, who co-wrote the last one, as well. The result is a more Gothic feel to the proceedings, especially when the location switches to Lockwood’s old mansion with genetics lab and creature holding cells in the basement a la Dr. Frankenstein. From here It becomes a tale of man’s greed and trying to play god…again. The Indominous Rex taught these greedy corporate types nothing and now we have the genetically created dino-soldier the Indoraptor to serve as our predator of choice for this flick. After the escape from the burning island…which is a very entertaining set-piece in itself, the flick becomes more of a James Bond movie with dinosaurs. The second third finds Claire and Owen sneaking around the castle-like mansion with Lockwood’s granddaughter, Maisie (Isabella Sermon), trying to find a way to stop the sale of and genetic tampering with the last survivors of Isla Nublar. It’s not quite as fun as the last flick, but at least they are trying to take the series in a new direction and we actually get off the island. The last act has the skilled director Bayona going back to his haunted house roots with a cat and mouse chase through the dark and cavernous mansion between our heroes and the Indoraptor, with a very exciting and very Gothic rooftop finale. Overall it is an entertaining flick, though a bit darker, a bit more violent and somewhat less fun than Jurassic World.

The cast is fine, even if the bad guys are complete two-dimensional stereotypes. Pratt and Howard still have that chemistry as Owen and Claire and having them broken-up gives us a chance to experience their combative banter and then having them fall for each other all over again. Young Isabella Sermon is endearing as Maisie, Lockwood’s young granddaughter with some secrets of her own. Rafe Spall, Ted Levine and Toby Jones are the trio of bad guys as Lockwood’s conniving assistant, a soldier for hire and a black market dinosaur dealer respectively. While the characters are familiar and stale, the actors give it their best. Cromwell is charming as the elder Lockwood, who is having his dream corrupted right out from under him. Rounding out the main characters are Justice Smith and Daniella Pineda playing Claire’s IT tech Franklin and dinosaur veterinarian Zia, respectively and they are fun characters well portrayed. We also get a nice cameo with Jeff Goldblum reprising his role as Dr. Ian Malcolm and B.D. Wong returns as slimy Dr. Wu. A good cast though some characters are better written than others.

Jurassic World gave this series a bit of revived energy and while this installment is a bit less fun, it does take the series to some new places and Bayona gives it a darker and more Gothic tone, as well as, his trademark visual artistry. On the negative side, the whole predator du jour chasing our heroes is getting stale, as is genetically whipping up new creatures like ordering a pizza. The dinosaur auction was interesting, but one wonders where the authorities stand on black market dinosaur flea markets. Guess it’s too soon to approach that side of the story. It was fun to see Clair and Owen and company playing James Bond in this massive Victorian Mansion, as we also enjoyed the film leaving us at a point where we wonder if mankind’s meddling might get us slapped back to the stone age. Stay through the credits.

-MonsterZero NJ

  Rated 3 T-Rex

TOMB OF NOSTALGIA: LOOKER (1981)

LOOKER (1981)

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Looker is an 80s mystery/thriller with some science fiction overtones that today, some of which, would be considered science fact. The film opens with the mysterious death of a beautiful young girl. She’s not the first to die like this and not the first to be a patient of high profile L.A. plastic surgeon Dr. Larry Roberts (Albert Finney). Roberts finds it odd that these beautiful women came to him with specific and practically unnoticeable changes in the first place, but now those same girls are winding up dead. Despite some evidence left at the crime scenes for police that Roberts is involved, he begins to investigate the deaths himself with the help of model and friend Cindy (Susan Dey). Roberts soon uncovers a possible conspiracy involving a shady research company called Digital Matrix and business tycoon John Reston (James Coburn). What is the Looker Project and why is Reston prepared to kill to keep it secret?

Written and directed by über-author Michael Crichton, Looker is a silly movie that does have some good ideas behind it. The idea of using computer generated actors and models was ahead of it’s time back in the early 80s, as is the concept of using computer generated imagery to place subconscious suggestions in viewers minds. Sadly these concepts are used in a film that starts out as an OK murder mystery, but gets increasingly silly as it goes along. The idea of this posh plastic surgeon turning all private detective is goofy enough, but to have him go complete James Bond in the last act, including sneaking into a pontificating villain’s lair and battling his thugs with futuristic weaponry, is almost laughable. Not to mention the actual reason for having the models killed is just borderline dumb to begin with. The last act is just plain wacky and not in a good way, and almost seems to be part of another far more campy movie. We’d actually have some fun with it on that level if it didn’t drag on for so long. Technically the film is well made and there is a cool 80s score by The Warriors composer Barry De Vorzon. The title tune sung by Sue Saad and the Next is probably the most memorable thing about the movie…though I do find it oddly charming, despite all it’s flaws, mostly because of how 80s it is.

Finney is a great actor, but doesn’t quite click as a sexy Beverly Hills plastic surgeon who beds woman more than half his age. He also looks outright uncomfortable during some of the action scenes. The legendary James Coburn is just going through the motions as a cliché megalomaniacal villain. Probably just a paycheck job, as his career was winding down at this point, as the 80s brought in a new generation of actors, like Harrison Ford and Sylvester Stallone, to steal the spotlight from the old school movie tough guys. Susan Dey is pretty as Cindy and actually comes off the most natural for the context of the film as Roberts’ somewhat ditzy romantic interest.

There is some cheesy 80s entertainment here and some good ideas mixed in with all the silliness. It starts off well enough, but gets increasingly goofy as it goes along. The usually excellent Finney is miscast and the last act really goes off the over-the-top deep end with a James Bond-ish finale set in a constantly rearranging television studio. It all occurs in front of a live audience…who are laughing as much as we are at this point. A misfire for sure, but not one without some nostalgic charm.

-MonsterZero NJ

 

Rated 2 and 1/2 (out of 4) scanned lookers…earns extra points for being charmingly 80s.

 

 

 

 

 

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REVIEW: THE 13th WARRIOR (1999)

THE 13th WARRIOR (1999)

I’ve always liked this flawed but very enjoyable action adventure since I first saw it. The 13th Warrior is based on a book by Michael Crichton called Eaters Of The Dead and tells the tale of Arab scholar Ahmad ibn Fadlan (Antonio Banderas) who is made an ambassador to a far off land as punishment for falling for the wife of a nobleman. On the way to his new assignment, he encounters a group of Norsemen and while staying in their camp is drawn into a quest by new king Buliwyf (Vladimir Kulich) to journey to a remote Norse kingdom and help rid them of mysterious foes that come out of the mist and murder and devour their people. Ahmad joins 12 other viking warriors including King Buliwyf in a battle against a phantom enemy that seems to be both man and beast. An outcast at first, the more they fight together, the more Ahmad and his unlikely companions become brothers in a fight against a savage and possibly supernatural enemy.

This 1999 adventure directed and co-written by Die Hard’s John McTiernan has a troubled history filled with re-shoots and talk of Crichton himself taking over the director’s reigns after poor reaction to preview screenings. That may explain why the film is a bit choppy in the first half, but, to be honest, even with a bit of an uneven narrative, the film is still an entertaining action adventure with a lot of bloody battles and a really fun covert raid into the mountain caverns where our villains reside. The film starts to click once they arrive in the besieged kingdom and even before that, the camaraderie between Banderas’ Arab scholar and these fierce Viking warriors makes this flick enjoyable. The film does convey well the bonding of this unlikely pairing and Ahmad’s slow earning of the men’s respect, as well as, finding the warrior and hero in himself is a lot of fun to watch unfold. There are also some really bloody action scenes as the vicious invaders try to take the village once and for all and our valiant group of few try to defend it and it’s people. Despite it’s flaws, the film does have an old fashioned action adventure spirit and it’s heart is in the right place. Whether it is McTiernan’s work coming through or the result of the additional post production efforts, the film is overall entertaining despite being far from perfect. There is some really nice use of the largely outdoor locations and the cast all perform well with Banderas being his usual charming self and the Viking warriors all being a very endearing bunch underneath their brutal and crude exteriors.

Not a classic but a fun and entertaining flick that is sadly under-appreciated. Also stars Tony Curran and the legendary Omar Sharif.

3 war axes!