TOMB OF NOSTALGIA: ALIEN CONTAMINATION (1980)

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ALIEN CONTAMINATION aka CONTAMINATION (1980)

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Italian filmmaker Luigi Cozzi is most known for his cheesy but colorful Star Wars rip-off Starcrash, and his Hercules films with Lou Ferrigno, but he also entered Alien territory with this 1980 sci-fi gorefest. Alien Contamination, or simply, Contamination finds an abandoned cargo ship drifting into New York harbor. When the ship is boarded, authorities find a dead crew and coffee cases filled with large avocado looking eggs. Worse still, when the eggs are ruptured, they spew a green fluid which causes the human body to literally explode into bloody pieces. New York Police Lieutenant Tony Aris (Marino Masé) investigates with military scientist Colonel Stella Holmes (Louise Marleau) and finds a conspiracy to destroy all life on earth involving Martians, allegedly dead astronauts and a Columbian coffee plantation.

Flick is written and directed by Cozzi and can be quite gruesome, but also unintentionally funny at times. It’s a silly flick that takes itself very seriously. The dialog is laughably bad, especially Lt. Aris’s hilarious “New York Cop”  dialog, making him sound like he’s from a grade Z 1940s detective movie. Another rib-tickling example of the Shakespearian prose is Stella and alcoholic ex-astronaut Hubbard’s (Ian McCulloch) exchange about his male proficiency. Let’s stay professional, folks! The pace is quite pedestrian and there are only spurts of bloody action before the climax. Even with the Earth’s entire population at stake, the characters never display any sense of urgency. The gore effects are plentiful and one of the best things about the flick. The eggs are quite rubbery looking, although they do make a creepy moaning sound as they pulsate so, they are effective. When our alien beastie is finally revealed at the climax it is a delightfully 1950s-ish tentacled cyclops that would be at home in any Roger Corman production. At least we have a cool electronic score by Goblin and the flick is mercifully short at only 82 minutes. Despite it’s shortcomings, if watched in the right mindset, it can be fun.

The cast won’t win any awards. Marleau is quite wooden as Stella and despite being a pretty actress, she generates no sex appeal even with a last act romantic interlude with Aris. As Aris, Masé is amusing with his heavy New York accent and ridiculous cop dialog. Zombie and Zombie Holocaust veteran Ian McCulloch plays drunken and disgraced astronaut, Commander Hubbard, who was laughed out of a job for claiming to have seen the eggs on Mars. Ironically, he was right all along. Rounding out the main cast is Siegfried Rauch as the alien-controlled villain, former astronaut Hamilton. He’s a bland bad guy and would be far better at home in a low level James Bond rip-off.

Overall, this a bad flick that can be fun when it’s badness is appreciated in the right way. It’s a shameless rip-off of parts of Alien with a hint of bad James Bond movie mixed in. There is awful dialog, wooden acting, terrible dubbing and lots of rubbery SPFX to keep one amused. It also has a lot of gore and an electronic score by legendary band Goblin (Romero’s Dawn of the Dead). With a few brews and watched in the right way, it can be a fun 80+ minutes of Italian gore nonsense.

 

-MonsterZero NJ

Rated 3 (out of 4) cheesy alien eggs.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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