HORROR YOU MIGHT HAVE MISSED: CHRISTMAS BLOODY CHRISTMAS (2022)

CHRISTMAS BLOODY CHRISTMAS (2022)

(Clicking the highlighted links brings you to corresponding reviews and articles here at The Movie Madhouse!)

It’s Christmas Eve and small-town record and video store owner Tori (Riley Dandy) is planning to hang out and get drunk with her friend and employee Robbie (Sam Delich). Meanwhile, at the T.W. Bonkers toys store, where her friends Jay (Jonah Ray) and Lahna (Dora Madison) work, the former military robot turned Santa Claus (Abraham Benrubi) reverts to its original combat programing and begins a bloody Christmas killing spree. Soon Tori and Robbie find themselves in a fight for survival as this yuletide terminator sets its sights on them and goes through anyone who crosses its path to get to them. Will they survive this O Holy Night?

Christmas Bloody Christmas is written and directed by Joe Begos (Bliss, VFW) and is another fun, 80s-esque flick from a director who obviously has a passion for his influences. From the atmospheric neon colored cinematography to the delightfully foul- mouthed and pop culture infused dialogue, this is a very entertaining holiday horror that pays tribute to many flicks of the past yet is its own thing. There is some solid suspense, some very plentiful and over-the-top gore and it has not only a devious sense of fun but a bit of a cynical and satirical look at this commercial time of year, too. What really makes this flick tick, though, is the awesome banter between Tori and Robbie that really endears you to the two characters before Santa comes a knocking. They are two hard-partying and foul-mouthed characters, with a love of movies and music, and the actors play their camaraderie and the sexual tension between them perfectly. It makes them very likable, especially Tori when she turns into a tough and resilient final girl when they are separated, and she goes mistletoe to toe with Santa on her own. Santa himself is an intimidating Christmas terminator and is quite an imposing villain without saying a word. The film obviously evokes The Terminator, but also evokes other robot run amok themed flicks like Class of 1999 and Hardware. It’s a fast paced, holiday action/horror that has some very delightfully gory moments, some impressive action sequences on a low budget and some engaging characters as Robo-Santa prey. It also wisely doesn’t wear out its welcome at just under 90 minutes. Production-wise the film looks great on what must be a very modest budget. The look of the film is a big factor, from Joe Begos’ visual style to the production design from Adam Dietrich and art direction from Elliott Gilbert.  Who wouldn’t want to work at Tori’s store? There is also a very atmospheric and very 80s score by Steve Moore, some great songs on the soundtrack, and that holiday themed neon drenched cinematography is by Brian Sowell along with solid gore and special make-up FX from Josh and Sierra Russell. A real holiday horror treat!

The small cast are really good here. As stated, Riley Dandy makes for a really likable heroine with her feisty, smart, resilient and delightfully foul-mouthed Tori. Her record store owner is a strong character to endear to and we are with Tori, jingling all the way for her survival. Sam Delich is also equally endearing as the confident and cocky leather jacket wearing Robbie. The two characters work very well together as do the actors who have strong on-screen chemistry. Begos regular Dora Madison is also likable and sexy as toy store employee Lahna and she also works well with Jonah Ray as her onscreen boyfriend Jay. Rob Zombie regular Jeff Daniel Phillips is also solid as the town sheriff who is faced with a mechanical Christmas nightmare, and Begos flick veterans Jeremy Gardner and Graham Skipper also appear. Rounding out is the spookily silent and intimidating work by Abraham Benrubi as the holly jolly killing machine.

Overall, this is a bloody fun holiday horror that pays homage to the robot killing machine flicks of the 80s, as well as your choice of Christmas themed slashers. Sure, we have seen the former military machine on a rampage before, but Begos knows it and just goes with it, parading his homages out in all their neon drenched holiday glory. There is some solid action, some nice suspense, some very gory kills and some really likable characters that give us the needed emotional investment in their fates. Riley Dandy is definitely a late entry in the best final girls of the year category with her smart-ass record store owner Tori, as is Sam Delich equally effective as her coworker/friend/love interest Robbie. A really fun holiday horror and one of the year’s best fright flicks. Begos has become a Jedi with making these homage filled 80s love letters. Now streaming on Shudder and in limited theatrical release.

-MonsterZero NJ

Rated 3 and 1/2 (out of 4) Christmas presents!

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HORROR TV YOU MIGHT HAVE MISSED: MST3K: THE RETURN (2017)

MST3K: THE RETURN (2017)

(Clicking the highlighted links brings you to corresponding reviews and articles here at The Movie Madhouse!)

Mystery Science Theater 3000 was created by Joel Hodgson and originally ran for ten seasons from 1988 till 1999 and was a beloved show for movie geeks everywhere, as it playfully skewered some of the worst cult classics and B-movies of all kinds. The format had a working stiff (originally series creator Joel Hodgson and then Mike Nelson) being kidnapped to a satellite in space and forced to watch some of the worst films ever made. The subject and a group of robots would then comment on these films as the series’ villains observed and routinely tried to make things miserable for our heroes. Fans have missed the show since it’s cancellation and were overjoyed to find out that Netflix was reviving it.

Premiering on Netflix streaming this April, the new series follows the same plot with newcomer Jonah (comedian Jonah Ray) being the newest test subject under the watchful evil eye of Kinga Forrester (Felicia Day), daughter of original series villain Dr. Clayton Forrester and Max (Patton Oswalt), otherwise known as The TV Son of TV’s Frank, offspring of original series villain TV’s Frank. There are fourteen new episodes featuring fourteen bad movies to which our hero, along with robots Gypsy, Tom Servo, Crow and Cam-bot, watch and mock while Kinga and Max do their best to make Jonah crazy…all with mostly hilarious results.

The revived series certainly is a welcome return and, for the most part, can be as funny as the original show. As with all the other seasons, there are some strong and hilarious episodes and some which are just OK. The key here is the movies have to provide the crew with something to work with. The funniest episodes of the new season, such as premiere episode Reptilicus, Time Travelers, Starcrash, The Land That Time Forgot and the season finale At The Earth’s Core all provide material that is ripe for commentary and the writers certainly take the ball and run with it. Then there are movies which are just bad, like Cry Wilderness, the first hour of Beast From Hollow Mountain, Wizards of the Lost Kingdom and Carnival Magic, which are so bad that Jonah and the boys struggle through them to keep the comments coming and funny. If the movie they’re watching is boring, there isn’t much the crew can do. Thankfully, the episodes that do work…and more do than don’t…hilariously make up for the few where laughs and fun are scarce. As with the previous seasons, there are movie geek references galore, such as Kinga’s house band looking delightfully like Infra-Man’s skull soldiers and meta references to previous episodes.

The cast are all having a blast and it shows. Jonah Ray is a suitable replacement for the earlier Joel and Mike. He’s a likable lug and fits the part well. Felicia Day is having a blast as Kinga, a cross between Cruella Deville and Veruca Salt. Day knows how to ad camp in just the right amounts and to dial up just enough villainy so Kinga stays a fun bad girl, like her predecessors and doesn’t tip over into unlikable. Patton Oswalt is equally successful as the bumbling Max…who has a crush on Kinga, which she obviously ignores…and is not quite such a bad guy as his boss lady…though he is trying. The robots’ voice actors all do a good job with instilling them with personality, although they are the same characters from the original show, so they don’t have to work as hard to establish themselves like out new leads. There are also cameos from original series characters and actors and some amusing appearances from famous faces such as Mark Hamill and Jerry Seinfeld.

Overall, this is a very happy return for a personal favorite show. The new cast and characters are likable and fit in with the show’s established style and the old format still works and works well when given material ripe for the picking-on. There are a few yawn inducing episodes, when the movie itself is dull and not even funny in the wrong way, but when the movie is the right kind of bad, the episodes measure up to some of the previous series best on equal footing. Welcome back MST3K!…and when can we expect season 12???

EPISODE LIST

(Rating the show by episode instead of the usual overall rating)

1. Reptilicus – 3 and 1/2 stars
2. Cry Wilderness – 2 and 1/2 stars
3. Time Travelers – 3 and 1/2 stars
4. Avalanche – 2 and 1/2 stars
5. The Beast of Hollow Mountain – 3 stars…the last 1/2 hour was very funny
6. Starcrash – 3 and 1/2 stars
7. The Land That Time Forgot – 3 and 1/2 stars
8. The Loves Of Hercules – 3 stars
9. Yongary – 3 and 1/2 stars
   
10. Wizards of the Lost Kingdom – 2 and 1/2 stars
    
11. Wizards of the Lost Kingdom II – 3 stars
    
12. Carnival Magic – 2 and 1/2 stars
    
13. The Christmas That Almost Wasn’t – 2 and 1/2 stars
    
14. At the Earth’s Core – 3 and 1/2 stars
    

-MonsterZero NJ