BARE BONES: CRITTERS ATTACK! (2019)

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CRITTERS ATTACK! (2019)

Revival of the classic franchise is sadly disappointing as the Krites…or Critters…return to earth after last being seen here in 1991’s Critters 3. They land near a small town, much like in the first two features and start to chow-down on the inhabitants. They cause trouble most specifically for a babysitter (Tashiana Washington), her two charges (Jack Fulton and Ava Preston) and her younger brother (Jaeden Noel), who find a friendly Krite female while hiking. Luckily Dee Wallace shows up (reprising her role from the first flick…maybe?) and goes Critter hunting!

Sequel is directed very by-the-numbers by Bobby Miller from a witless and dull script by Scott Lobdell. It’s so low budget, it looks like someone’s homemade fan film and the acting is strictly amateur, save for the veteran Wallace. Aside from the female Krite our teens adopt as a pet, there is little new or innovative here and not much reason to revisit this franchise. There is some decent gore…when they bother to show it, and the Critters are delightfully still rubber puppets, but there is little fun in their new exploits. At least there is a cool 80s-ish soundtrack from Russ Howard III.

A sadly underwhelming direct-to-digital sequel that begs one to revisit the originals instead…at least the first two anyway. While on the subject, there is also Shudder’s Critters: A New Binge web series, which is supposedly not much better.

-MonsterZero NJ

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